F9 (Fast & Furious 9): Movie Review

"F9" or "Fast & Furious 9" is the craziest and most bombastic entry yet in the never-ending "Fast & Furious" franchise. It is also the dumbest yet. Maybe we're getting old or maybe this craziness is getting old but for us, "F9" was simply out-of-whack and the weakest entry yet. It was a bloated sensory overload not worth your time unless you're one of the hardiest action aficionados out in the wild.
Dom Toretto (Vin Diesel) is leading a quiet life with Letty (Michelle Rodriguez) and his son, little Brian. But when Roman (Tyrese Gibson), Tej (Ludacris), and Ramsey (Nathalie Emmanuel) show up suddenly, Dom is once again forced to suit up to save the world. This time Dom will confront an enemy literally very close to his heart - a man who happens to be Dom’s forsaken brother, Jakob (John Cena). They must stop Jakob and his rich benefactor from getting a device called Ares which can control every computer in the planet and with it every weapon in the world.
At two and a half hours long, "F9" was a daunting experience to begin with. The film literally has everything giving more insight on Dom's past, some semblance on how a certain character has been revived from the dead, how he has suddenly has a brother no one ever mentioned before, and a vaguely similar plot device  in the previous film (the God's Eye from "F8"). Unfortunately, this was just all noise and to be blunt - clear and wasteful horsesh*t. Our expectations were never high but the over-the-top story, insane action sequences, and survivability of these characters just kept putting us off the whole experience. Even Roman jokes around that there invincible and we wouldn't be surprised in the next entry that "F10" transforms these characters into superheroes because clearly, anything can happen in this franchise at this point. Now if you're just for all-out action, then "F9" won't disappoint. From rocketing into outer space inside a Fiero, from a armored truck going against a fighter jet, the action has never been more creative, jaw-dropping, and mind-numbing. Overall, "F9" just wasn't our cup of tea. It's getting to a point that all this craziness was just too tiring and so unnecessary.   
Rating: 1 and a half reels

Why you should watch it:
- if you're here for action then the biggest and craziest action is what you'll get

Why you shouldn't watch it:
- just goes too over-the-top for our taste
- two and a half hours of complete and utter horsesh*t
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